Amuse me…

The more time goes on, the more I realize the significant deficit in autism awareness. The term ‘talk is cheap,’ comes to my mind over and over on this subject. In a perfect world, I would like to think that the medical, scientific, and education professionals have vast knowledge in understanding and/or teaching the autistic brain… but in all reality, they don’t have a clue. It seems that only parents or caretakers of autistic children and adults, truly understand it. Upon rising numbers of children presenting with autisim or on the autistic spectrum, the school system pushes policies for inclusion, policies for special instruction, and modifications to standardized testing for special needs and learning disabled children appears as if they are adapting to the changing educational environment of the traditional general education classroom–but in reality, these changes/modifications in standard and promises for inclusion, continuing education for educators and other support systems, do not truly contain a shred of emphasis on the visual learning autistic child. Having an autistic child, and therefore first hand knowledge and understanding of the condition, I can say with experience, and passion, that all these supposed charitable modifications and policies that are nothing but empty promises, designed to subside screaming parents of autistic children from continuing the fight for more services… it appears to be the old throw them a bone trick–and it saddens me to my deepest core.

I am in total awe of my fabulous autistic son, he never ceases to amaze me, or make me smile. One would never know he was autistic just by meeting him, they instead would maybe think what a funny, or quirkey kid… but it is a reality–he is autistic. Although he is high functioning autistic (HFA), he still has textbook characteristics of the typical autistic child, and the HUGE barriers that those chracteristics place in the life of a growing boy. His social deficits are great, although he has come a long way, these deficits are real, and the older he gets, the more visible they are to see and recognize. He is intelligent beyond genious in certain areas, he has actually taught himself a bit of computer video game programming in the past year–how many 13 year olds do you know that can do that?! He has his schedule, and he thrives by sticking to it. He loves to go to school, and has ever since he began, and so far he has done very well. Elementary school was a breeze–a little more work than a normal learning child like his twin sister, but still, he did vey well and had excellent teachers and support throughout the elementary years. Middle school came along and pulled us down, head first, into a constant nightmare and fight for a life that deserves to be GREAT–and educated.

My son had been on grade level in all of his subjects–except for reading comprehension throughout elementary school, when we did his evaluation for middle school, we had put supports in place for his deficit in comprehension in the areas of having a para-teacher (one-on-one) with him in the two advanced classes that he would have to take (science and advanced social studies); and a reading class devoted to reading comprehension. But as many things did, all of that fell short at the new school with the new team of special education “professionals.”  Disclaimer: They may be specialist in the ‘special’ education of non-autistic special needs students… but clearly, have no real understanding, experience or great knowledge when it comes to educating autistic children–I learned that one the hard way.

Without getting into bashing the deficits in public special education in one blog… I only want to address ”reading comprehension” today–which is our current greatest battle…  As a parent without a teaching degree, and expertise in the requirements of the typical learner, we normally assume that reading comprehension is the ability to comprehend what is read–we think of it in terms of, for instance take the story of Jack and Jill–the facts are: (as the story is written: “Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after.”) Comprehension facts: who: Jack and Jill; what did they do: ran up the hill; for what: to fetch a pail of water; then what happened: (who) Jack fell down; what happened: and broke his crown; and (who) Jill (what) came tumbling after. Most children can complete a regular comprehension quiz on this with little issue–even an autistic child. Now, lets use the same story and bring in what we are experienceing in the 7th grade “comprehension” tasks: Why do you suppose that Jack and Jill had to go up a hill to fetch water? How do you suppose Jack fell down the hill? …and why did Jill go tumbling after Jack? As you see, we have come away from the cold hard facts written in the story, to inferences about the story (stuff that could have been there–but was never actually written in the story–imaginative theories).  To make a long story short, my autistic son, who takes everything at FACT value, is unable to inference–meaning, in the school opinion–he cannot comprehend text. Well, his lack of “comprehensiion skills have built the biggest wall in our path to a diploma, as standard educational comprenension includes this inferencing to define ‘comprehension’ ability, and, this standard, has begun to affect the rest of his subjects because at weeks end whether science, social studies, english, reading, health, etc…, there is always a quiz or exam requireing him to write a clear BCR — or address an inference they give to show that he has learned the material in context. Nevermind that he memorized the FACTS, and all of the chapter vocab and definitions, and knows them, and can be tested on them–he fails, because he cannot express–orally or in writing, how something that he didn’t actually read (but has to make up and relate to the topic) has meaning. And the end result is always the same, sorry, he failed the  comprehension part of the exam because he did not write or articulate an acceptable BCR (writing)–which means that he did not actually “comprehend” the material. FAIL!

So, my autistic son has HUGE deficits in imagination and fantasy land–most autistic children do… but does than mean he cannot learn, or will never be able to “comprehend” what he reads (beyond the facts), or does not deserve to be educated in the regular old school subjects that used to be just cold hard FACTS of science, social studies or literature?? Absolutely not! –but it is the standard of regular education learning that falls short for him.

To further elaborate on this issue… My next question would be, if science shows that autistic children are visual learners… and can and do learn very well visually, isnt it more fundamental to modify curriculum to visual presentation and testing to “accomodate” autistic children in general education classrooms? Seriously, look at it this way… would one place their child into a french speaking school and expect them to prosper? To comprehend and inference in a language that they cannot process like the other children? Then why are autistic children expected to learn in a language that they do not understand in order to receive a diploma that say that they learned the required school subjects? There is so much science on autism and so many studies filled with information on how the autistic brain learns, and on visual learning… I ask that educators learn these things, and implement so modifications in the special education standards to INCLUDE autistic children and the way that they are able to learn. Contrary to popular–uneducated–beleif, autism is not idiocy, these kids are not stupid by any means, and unable or unwilling to learn, they are highly intelligent–far more than they are given credit for being… they just learn differently… So when we sit around tables and talk about implementing new  modifications to “special needs” testing, why not get educated on the NEEDS, and strengths of the individual audiences in which the tests are actually for, and maker better choices. All special needs are not the same — public school systems have specific modified tests for the blind, and the def–time to adapt one for austim.

Personally, sometimes I get so frustrated and truly exhausted of fighting, and feel that I just cannot do this fight thing any longer… at the times when I feel as though I am being backed into a corner by the great danes of policy and standards, when hopelessness rears up… I realize, our reality… and I get up… and I begin to feel empowered again, like a pitbull in a chihauhua pen… because as long as I am breathing, I will continue the fight for my sons rights to a fair education–and those beautiful autistic children who will come after him, and little by little there will be change–POSITIVE change. I know they look at me as a stubborn, difficult, and opinionated parent… however, through my action and my words, they also must look at me as educated, dedicated and unfallible when it comes to my children’s education. I will not apologize for making their department work more… there will be children who come after my son, children that deserve the best education… the same education and supports as normal children… and with every step of progress I make, I will continue to shine the light on autism until it becomes a beacon!

(…stepping down and away from the pulpit..)

At the end of the day, I remain thankful that my God has given me an enormous amount of undisputable strength, and I know that throghout this battle, He is always on by side–so I will not fail. I cannot say that I am not tiring–but I can say, I will never give up.

xo’s

AKA Paris E

(Autism Mom… my current challenges, in Honor of the upcoming “World Autism Day” or “Autism Awareness Day” on April 2nd…. Light it up Blue for Autism Awareness– wear blue, install blue lights on the outside of your homes, or beam one in an inside lamp by the window… Light up a who office building blue… whatever it may be, support autism awareness in yuor area… )

PSA: Dear Public, please be aware that when you support cuts to Federal spending, and pay freezes for Federal employees, you are not just talking about the fat boys on Capitol Hill, Congress members, etc… You are also affecting the unseen by the public eye ‘little people.’ You are affecting the pay of millions of already underpaid, overworked, and undervalued Federal government workers, people such as those in the social security office who process your social security claims and checks, medicaid, disability claims and checks, unemployment claims and checks, social services and supports, and other SSI/DHHS services. You are supporting freezing the pay of already underpaid/overworked Federal workers who provide invaluable services to the public, such as researchers and support staff finding cures to common diseases, studing the envornment, making perscription drugs, providing medical care and access to medical care to the underserved populations, providing assistance and government grants to send poor kids to school and college, non-military men and women serving our country when disaster strikes–all these poeple out here serving the communities in which we live. These are the ‘Federal employees who are going to be hit the hardest by these decisions to cut Federal spending and freeze Federal pay. Realize, that you are affecting the little people the most, be knowledgable and wise in what you choose to support–thoroughly think it through. Your support of continually penalizing Federal employees affects more than the public big wigs, in supporting these cuts and freezes, you will begin to see the negative effects of a very low moral in Federal government workers and offices, creating longer lines, longer wait times, grumpier–uncaring workers, unfocused workers who are too stresssed out by not being able to provide for their families to be focused you and YOUR claim or your case whatever that may be. It is not-so-much the big wigs on the chopping block as it is more the little people who are already struggling more than their private sector colleagues to make ends meet in a every rising economy with no cost of living benefits coules with higher insurance premiums for the last year and the next year to come, all in the ever-rising cost of living expenses… No hope = no moral, which = people who just stop giving a care.

All that said, be politically aware of the people you are affecting–Federal workers are every where–not just in Congress.

…that is all.

xo’s
AKA Paris E.

I read a story the other day about a couple living in a 1.2 million dollar home on a lake…with a boat and dock, frequently traveling the world–each receiving Federal fund–allocated by our tax dollars (for people in need)–for 1) disability–both husband and wife are receiving, 2) Wife is receiving $1,200.00 in ‘rental assistance’, 3) social services (AKA welfare) checks, AND 4) food stamps.

Now I know for a fact that this is NOT an isolated case– this type of fraud is going on everywhere and there are more than thousands of cases of blatant welfare fraud in almost every major city (I, personally, have seen MANY not-so much- in need people abusing the system). My question is HOW the heck are we allowing this to go on?? This is our tax money at work… and we are literally paying for LAZY able-bodied people to sit at home and scam the Government into funding their lifestyle of luxury, while hard-working people who are TRULY in need are turned down daily BECAUSE they work for a living–and are thereby disqualified as ineligible for such services. This is a total injustice and failure of the ‘system’ in my opinion, and it angers me to read or hear about such fraudulent waste of government funds (my tax dollars)–the public–or welfare abusers need to be relieved that I am not running Social Services… REALLY.  It is time–past time–once again–to look in to ‘welfare reform.’ There are HUGE glitches in the current system…and has been for YEARS.

We have a voice on this–we can exert our voice to influence or encourage REFORM–INVESTIGATION. I don’t get it, so many people listen to the news, rumors other people’s opinions such as friends, family and co-workers to e their ‘source’ to hear and/or learn about politics and what is happening in the world… But are you hearing and learning reality–or someone’s opinion? My thought, instead of learning form the streets, take the initiative to READ, learn and become knowledgeable about what is really going on–how things work, exactly where our/you  tax dollars go, and all of the who what where’s and why’s of politics and budget. Learn WHO the go to people are in your community… Things remain the same because so many remain blind,  and this is shameful, when We KNOW (or should know) that change will only occur if WE (the tax payers–voters) are knowledgeable, and stand up and let our voices of concern be heard. Seriously, I am tired of hearing unknowledgeable people complain about this government spending and waste issue–and debate about government cuts (including the wherewithal answer of just cutting WORKING people’s salaries)… how using our voices to demand investigating on the money vacuum government programs that we have in place… those that allow abuse and WASTE of government funds? Sometimes, when I hear people complaining about government, I have to ask them, how do you know this–what and who are your sources and lastly, while you are complaining about the issue…what are YOU doing to facilitate change in these areas? –Sadly, my questions are replies to with a blank stare. A blank stare that unspokenly proves they have no real concept. Jump on a band wagon without the facts… who does that–too many. This is America… a country run–on paper, at least–as being a democracy (remember that word… we learned it in school… the two type of government: democracy and authoritarian??)… but when there doesn’t seem to be much democracy we want to know WHY–but instead of question the right people (law makers and officials in positions (positions we put them in) to facilitate change or bring up concerns), we just stand around the water cooler and blindly complain.

All this to say–back to the welfare fraud issue–and even all other political/government concerns, we need some reform in government programs–use your American born right to democracy for good… Look around, learn, and be aware of what is ‘really going on’, and actively do something about your concerns. Write letters, attend community meetings, and VOTE (not just in the presidential elections either–the minor elections are significant as well!) use your voice. Be active and proactive. Knowledge is power, and power brings change…

Ok enough said… rant over!

As always… Live Love laugh…Be happy, be productive…
xo’s
AKA Paris E.

Now, I can take jokes just as well as the next person, and I am definitely known to put out quite a few on a regular basis myself… however, I received an email bashing our President today and funny as that email ‘joke’ may have been to some, I am a die-hard Democrat—I am an American—and I respectfully served in our military (1st Gulf War Vet!) to support my country, and now I work for in the Federal government system—so basically this man is my boss, …but more than that, I have a personal, ‘politically-aware’, sincere, vested sense of ‘investment’ in this country that we all live, work, and are free to play in, and I don’t think that literary bashing of our President is acceptable–especially for a President who has really shown no signs of unprofessionalism, or un-Americanism in the two years that he has spent being the “clean up man.” “Lying thief?” Really?! I don’t think that our President did any lying, conniving or thieving. I sincerely think he did his best in a very ugly and tough situation that was left to him from YEARS of egregious mismanagement of US government resources by many Presidents before him…

**No matter who our President is (even though I didn’t agree with the previous administration actions in certain areas—it was STILL OUR Administration—and I never bashed our President—whomever it was). As Americans, yes, free speech is in our right, however, we should have enough respect for our country and support the person that is tasked with all the BS of running an entire country–it’s a dam tough job—and somebody has to do it—and in my HUMBLE opinion… unless we think that we could really get in there and do the job better, we need not show such disrespect—or at least not pass it on to those of us who support our country and have literally fought for our country… no matter who’s hands it was/is in. Just as in my household, you don’t like how it’s being run—then stop complaining and leave, go see if the grass is greener on the other side. Enough said.

I realize that this email was just a forward—and I am not shooting the messenger so to speak… however I will say, next time the disrespect of our President jokes come around, I hope that they will kindly leave me off the forward list. I don’t appreciate receiving things to this nature… (especially not to my “Federal Government” email address —>how distasteful!)

(…and yes, in case you were wondering, my reply ‘to all’ was similar to this one )

Patriotically and respectfully…

 AKA Paris E

…Ladies… stand in the mirror and repeat this 20 times daily: Having a man does not make you or break you!

Too often, during the proverbial girl talk with friends, relatives, co-workers, etc…, I seem to be hearing constant dramatic-isms of how miserable these ladies are because either they can’t find a man, or they are having problems with their man… and it seems to consume their whole perception of their lives in a negative manner. My response and advice to these women is the same every time–but first, I have to ask WHY? I mean seriously, I was brought up to be super independent, not to depend on a man, husband, or partner for anything—but to have my own so-to-speak. Don’t get me wrong, having someone to share this wonderful life’s journey with is a pleasant plus–but it isn’t the end of all if we don’t have that at the moment. Personally, I know that I CAN–I and have survived on my own plenty of times–happilly, and I have never allowed a man or a bad relationship to devour my outlook on life–I am the creator of my own outlook. So I have to wonder, where are these women learning this behavior? Where does that come from–men certainly don’t act this way.  But then I have to step back and look around… and realize that this frame of thinking is the societal norm, and I am the one, actually outside the great definition of ‘the norm’.

Society has pushed the ‘socially correct’ path of women for centuries—from day one, as a matter of fact, and sadly, I have to say that subconsciously, in society’s small-minded idealism, that ‘correct’ path, really hasn’t changed to much! 

Back in the ‘old days,’ women were raised to follow only the straight and narrow marry, have children, cook, clean, teach, and take care of her family path. It was not important that she be educated, be worldly or knowledgeable, as long as she could cook and clean, take care of her husband and bear children, she was good. Later, as women began showing up in the workforce (teachers, nurses, secretaries, etc..), education and social rights began changing for women, and as time went on, women won more and more different items to add to her path–but still–society continued to nonchalantly push the ‘socially correct’ path. For instance, let’s take a look at our feminine fairy tales, shall we.

Let’s see, we have Cinderella. Cinderella was a victim of her evil step-mother—her father’s second wife who had her own three daughters, whom she was trying to marry off to the wealthiest suitor. Because she was the ‘step-child’, she was forced to do all the duties the other women in the house did not want to do… cook, clean, sew, garden, etc… While the other daughters focused on how to catch the perfect husband. The fairy tale did not focus on anything other than the importance of attracting a good husband—attract the Prince, and life was a happily ever after. 

Moving on, snow White. Snow White was a beautiful princess—the fairest in the land… who got hated on by the jealous queen who instructed the woodsman to take her out to the forest to kill her. However the woodsman did not so the evil queen poisoned an apple to kill her. Snow White ate the apple and she never woke up. Somehow, the Prince finds her–is taken by her beauty, opens the casket and either kisses her (or shakes the casket whereby she spits up the apple–depending on which version you see/read) which awakens her. Snow White marries the Prince, and lives happily ever after. 

Next we have Sleeping Beauty. As a baby, Princess Aurora is cursed by an evil witch to die by her 16th birthday by a poisoned spinning-wheel. To try to prevent this, the king places her into hiding, in the care of three good fairies to protect her and one of the fairies casts a spell upon her that will allow the her to awake from an ageless sleep with a kiss from her true love… Needless to say, she gets poisoned, and is in ageless sleep, the Prince fights his way to her, kisses her, she awakes, she marries him and she lives happily ever after. 

…You get the point, from childhood on up we, girls, are put in the mindset that the most important thing for us in order to live happily ever after is to find Prince charming. Yes, finding Prince charming is great, but living our lives and following our dreams and reaching our goals are important too… so why are so many women putting their whole life’s outlook into having a man…?

I don’t know, just something I was pondering as I was listening to someone going on and on about how miserable this person has made her life…  I mean, yes, love is grand… but it isn’t the only thing that constitutes “happily ever after”.

Love yourself 1st Princesses! Make yourself happy 1st! Live YOUR lives in happiness and positivity… and love will come.

And that is all )

AKA Paris E.

Today’s fashion statement (IMHO ): So the “Stepford Wife” dress and skinny belts are back… YUCK!

No Bueno… So UNflattering, boooooo!  Me no likey… And that is all…

Happy Monday beautiful people!

AKA Paris E.

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Over the past few months, we have had hundreds of birds drop dead out of the sky–unexplained, hundreds of fish floating around dead in the waters–unexplained, and now we have hundreds of cows that just dropped dead–also unexplained. Some spiritually-minded people would warn that these unexplained events are all signs of the beginning of the apocalypse or end of the world, and then some scholarly people would try to explain it as science and/or the greenhouse effect, but no matter the viewpoint–these events remain–”unexplained.” How are these unrelated phenomenons occurring? Your guess is as good as mine. I just group it with all those other mysteries and phenomenons that are–to this day unexplainable. Things such as miracles, myths, ghosts, spirits, God, the entire universe for that matter… So I was just curious, where are you on this totem pole of thought? When people around you speak on these strange events, where does your mind take you?

xo’s
AKA Paris E.

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….Crazy, but I’m breaking hibernation mode again tonight! I’ll be heading out to DC for the Annual DMV Lawyers Ball …I swear people got me on celebrity socialite status so much so that my dance card is too full of Holiday and end-of-the-year events and VIP social soirees to make appearances at—but my question is: WHY do people schedule these things on the weekdays?? WTF… Anyway, for reputation sake, guess I’ll be out partying with the DMV Lawyers tonight–wish me warm thoughts … sigh, oh what to wear, what to wear… **I’ve been told that long johns and a parka would not be acceptable attire–I feel cold already–perhaps I will inquire about wearing a Snuggie… ! xo’s

Paris E-ismz: The new geek girl motto for 2011

For all of you who continually ask me on a regular:

…(you know, AFTER you have done all the things I warned you not to do the last time I fixed your ish…)

…Please note that I will be sporting this all new ‘tell-all in a Tee’ look in 2011…(the blinged out rhinestone version of course )      LMBO!!!!

Muahz & much love to ya’z!

:-p    AKA Paris E.

I admit, I am really having some issues with this new freezing Federal pay thing…

Dear Mr. President, pls realize that, contrary to popular belief,  Federal employees make WAY under the salaries of private sector employees in the same job positions, AND our benefits are NOTHING like they used to be nor how the public perceives them to be. Our health insurance costs more and offers less than private sector health benefits (i.e., we have no dental or eye care coverage,  and what IS covered is grossly scrutinized and  many times refused)  and our out-of-pocket premium portions for health insurance is WAY above what private sector employees are paying). Truly, we cannot afford the increases in societal cost of living in our areas w/out the increased COLA (annual cost of living allowance) pay raises! It is bad enough government is continually shrinking the number of FTEs (Full Time Employees) agencies are allowed, so when people retire or leave (and their FTE is cut)… their workload is being dumped on current employees–so much that we are inhumanly overworked, and yet we are seriously STILL UNDERPAID for the amount of our workloads due to these mandated personnel cuts.

In other words, plainly speaking, Federal employees are already grossly under paid for doing twice and sometimes three-four times the work???  Freezing Federal pay now or ever would be a GRAVE injustice toward already overworked and underpaid Federal workers! #EPICFAIL!

…and that is all.

AKA Paris E.